Are you talking to the one's you love, or are you communicating with them?
|How often have you talked to your friend, co-worker, family member, husband, wife, or significant other, and left the conversation asking yourself, "Did they hear what I said to them"? |
Each and every day we talk with people. Talking with people is an important part of our daily life. When we talk with people, we are relaying information to them. When we talk with people, we are opening up the door for communication to take place. Talking with someone, and communicating with them, are two different things.
Often times, we all make the mistake of believing, or worse yet, 'assuming' that we have communicated with the person that is near and dear to us, just because they have replied back to us, in some form or fashion.
While it is good, and healthy, to relay information to the person we care about, when we talk with them, we need to be mindful that just because we talked to them, that doesn't necessarily mean that we have communicated with them, or that they have communicated with us.
There is a big difference between talking with someone, and communicating with them. When we talk with someone, we are simply relaying information to them. We are not concerned about what they may, or may not do with the information that was relayed to them. When we communicate with someone, we are not only sharing information with them,(whether perceived or real )we are also sharing with them the reason why we believe, and feel a certain way, at a particular moment. When we communicate with someone, we are asking them to not only to embrace our message, we are also asking them to embrace the messenger as well. We are asking them to digest what we have said to them, and then take positive action with us, so that change can occur in both our lives for the better.
Communication requires open, and active participation, between two people. It requires us to listen not only with our ears, but with our heart and soul as well. It requires that we embrace both the message and the messenger, allowing what that person said to us, to become an active part of our life, in a positive and meaningful manner.
In order for our relationships to thrive and grow, there must be continual communication. There must be a communing of our heart and soul, with the one we care about.
If you have ever felt that you were not being listened to, in the manner in which you needed and desired, you need to ask yourself these questions.
1) Did I communicate my needs and desires clearly?
2) Did I communicate my message with compassion for myself, and the other person?
3) Have I been consistent in my communication?
4) Am I asking the other person to do something, that I haven't been doing myself?
Communicating with someone isn't about being the one that is right all the time. Communicating with someone isn't about me, me, me. The manner in which we express ourself, is just as important as what we say. Words are eternal.
Are you a good communicator?